We took in a girl who's husband had left her on our door step 17 and pregnant. He abandoned her to us. Part of me felt the motherly instinct to protect her. That instinct gets me in trouble a lot but I try to be nice and help. I love to help, as long as I am not punished for my help. What is that saying? No good deed goes unpunished? Did they write that about us?
We rented a house to a "friend" and they trashed it. I mean tore up the floor, broke holes in the walls, let food decay in our brand new fridge, etc. We had to almost gut the house and start fresh in order to sell it. On top of paying rent and mortgage because he had to PCS before this could be completed. We were in a tight spot. We lost all our nest egg in that house, I won't list a number it still hurts.
Meanwhile I was trying to get Yummy Luxe Couture off the ground. I was designing the tees myself, printing them and selling them. With cute sayings like "Sweet as Suger Wanna Taste?" Yummy was a little cute, sass, and naughty. It was for adults. Kolten was born and shortly after we left MD.
I toiled away at Yummy, getting some acclaim and even a fashion spread in a local magazine and some screen shots on a local tv show. I also made friends with wardrobe specialist for magazine shoots and tv to get a few more designs out into the right hands. I thought I was well on my way. Nothing really happened after that. Sometime after that I wrote and published my first novel.
Karisma was born in 2007 and I started making bows. Something about having a little girl makes you want to make bows, especially when you see how expensive they are.
Karismatic Couture was born. I started to learn to sew one of my first things was ruffles on clothing I was obsessed. I dreamed of opening a shop of my ruffly clothes and put Yummy aside. Hoping I would someday be able to pick it up again.
Then I learned to make tutus and tutu dresses I made into fairy costumes for Karisma. After Ben was laid off we had to sell our ribbon and tulle to survive and I lost interest in the craft. I started to lose hope.
Moving to Texas opened more opportunities for me to live my dream and design clothing for my daughter. I started with skirts and then pettiskirts, I found I was really good at sewing them and spent many an hour sewing petti fluff on ANYTHING I could get my hands on. Karismatic Couture gave way to Karismatic Chaos and I thought finally we would be successful. Unfortunately I was too helpful and someone I sewed for not only drained me physically because I could barely get my orders done but creatively as well. Of course when I shut down operations I noticed some of my ideas I told her in private or ones I released in Arizona and were planning on doing that here were in her new collections. Or the fact I loaned her my equipment and had to BEG her to get it back even when I had customers waiting on their products. She never once thought of how that would effect me. I truly wonder if she did it on purpose, if she saw me as too much competition? Well that is between her and God I can honestly say I gave this the best try I could. I got an investor (who refused to go any further with funding even though I had orders) and was in a showroom, they barely sold anything. Emotionally and creatively I gave up. I burned out, and soon I closed down my baby. I am over it now.
So why tell you this in my blog, its not for sympathy or anger towards those that wronged me.
No to show how our negative does NOT have to hinder or influence the positive for the future. I had a few more ideas fall away but now I am working on a business that is flourishing that I can make a real difference at and can sell a product that not only can benefit their health greatly but change their lives financially.
I am writing again and now that I am not in pageants I can say that I write romance novels. I love to write its a passion. I want to be a New York times Bestseller and now I have time to dedicate to my writing. Its scary breaking into a new genre but I am ready for the challenge. I am also rehearsing my singing and writing songs again. My voice is improving and near the caliber it was when I was young and singing all over. Most of all though I run a business, have hobbies, and actually get to spend time with my children, friends, and husband. I couldn't do that before. I would have to work all the time night and day to make very little. Now I don't have to sell 1 million pcs to make a million. I just have to bring in a few people who do the same and they sell $50-100 each (like 3-7 boxes) and I have to sell that too (or buy it and drink it WOO HOO). Much less burden, with a much bigger payout.
So I am hoping that this dark cloud that started when I helped that girl is lifted this year. That we are finally free from the bondage. I feel the ropes loosening but they are not off yet. At least that is a start and I will do anything the Lord directs me to do, all I ask is please God let it be the right thing that will work. Fingers crossed I think I found it. Wouldn't it be funny 2012, the year that is supposed to spell our doom, actually turns out to be our salvation? God works in mysterious ways I know that to be true so I don't discount anything anymore.
God Bless,
Andi
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